I'm nervous writing this.
I really want this space to be as transparent as possible about me and my life, what drives me and what connects me. In being vulnerable and opening myself up to potential criticism, there are infinite possibilities as to how this can go. But I want to talk. I want a voice. And I want to be on the other side to let others know it is okay to feel how you feel.
I really struggled becoming a mother.
My whole life, thats all I ever wanted. I couldn't wait to be pregnant and have my baby and it would just be the most amazing experience of my life. I had a pretty awful and traumatising pregnancy, with some issues and hyperemesis gravidarum. I vomited every single day for nine months (multiple times a day, sometimes), even with strong medication. I took to pregnancy like a fish takes to land - my body seemed to reject the notion of a human growing inside me. I really struggled with not loving pregnancy - I've wanted this forever! I should be happy I am able to carry and birth my babe, but my body and mind just couldn't catch up.
The moment my boy was born I think I was completely floored and overwhelmed. What was I supposed to do with this tiny human who was reliant on me for his life? I struggled immediately and hated the monotony of my days. I struggled with my expectations of myself - I have always wanted this! I was born to be a mother! I thought I would take to it like a duck in water but the reality was so much further from the truth. I felt so isolated, even though I was surrounded by people. Minutes turned into days which turned into weeks and it was around March I realised that something was wrong.
The thing is, nothing can prepare you for motherhood. And it isn't in the pamphlet at the hospital telling you what is and isn't normal feelings. After some googling and a panic attack, I realised I had post-natal depression. I had no joy, the idea of sitting at home with my new baby was causing severe anxiety, and I was terrified to be alone with him. I was terrified of everything in my house that could hurt him, and more than ever, I was so scared of losing control of my own mental health as I felt myself slipping down a big dark hole.
I loved my baby, I did. But my connection to him wasn't instant. It was around 3-4 months later that I realised that I did love him immensely, and our bond only grew and grew from there. I had amazing family support and saw my psychologist, and was put on medication. Slowly, the haze lifted, and the darkness began subsiding.
Without the support I had, and the friends to tell me it was okay to feel how I was feeling, I don't think I would be where I am today. I have the happiest fifteen month old (despite the terrible twos hitting a year early!). But most of all, I am happy. I prioritised my mental health. I took the time I needed to get well. And we are both thriving.
It's okay not to feel all the things you are 'meant' to feel. Life isn't Instagram, and it isn't always sunshine and roses. You are fully entitled to feel what you are feeling, but recognising and accepting those feelings is such an important part of the process. Being a mum is the hardest, most exhausting, wonderful and fulfilling job, but it is also the toughest job on your mind. The mental load and mum guilt you immediately feel is overwhelming and terrible at times. But it's normal. What you are feeling is normal.
This is why I am so passionate about capturing your now. Because when you are out of the haze, you look back on those early moments of the first year and remember how you feel, the good, the bad and the ugly. Your life, your story.
So to all my fellow mamas out there doing it tough or coming out of the haze, I got you. We're in this together. You're never alone.
All my love.
I am so unbelievably excited to be able to offer this collection. Nothing makes me happier than my returning clients getting in touch, and being able to document babes from bump all the way through childhood. Let me create those memories for you.
I remember when I had Ted, I never took my camera out. I know! Some photographer! But I was sleep deprived and honestly the last thing I thought about doing was pulling out my DSLR and snapping away. Sure, I have a million iPhone photos, but they aren't the same.
So let me do it for you.
4 sessions over the first year of your little loves life, documenting the stages that go so very quickly. Included in this package -
Mini Maternity, featuring a 30 minute session at location of your choice and 20 images on an online gallery with upgrade options available.
Fresh 48 or Newborn session, featuring a 60-90 minute session at hospital or at home and 40 images on an online gallery with upgrade options available.
6 month old session, featuring a 60-90 minute session outdoors or at home and 40 images on an online gallery with upgrade options available.
12 month old session, featuring a 60-90 minute session outdoors or at home and 40 images on an online gallery with upgrade options available.
These sessions total $1560 in value, however your investment for this collection is $900, with payment required upon booking (payment plans are available prior to birth).
Sound fun? Lets chat! I am more than happy to chat about what you are after and tailor a payment plan that suits you, so you can have all these memories to cherish forever. Because as a mama bear 15 months into this crazy ride, let me tell you, it goes so quick!!
Do you ever feel like life goes too quickly?
Ever since having Teddy, I feel like life is flying by. Way too quick. Each day faster than the next. It's not until you have kids that you can actually see time move, watch as everyday they grow and learn and change. It's a pretty miraculous thing. But, for me, its also super fleeting and I just want time to stand still.
I started this collection in the hopes that I had clients that felt the same way as I do. That each moment is worth capturing, your everyday, your life as you live it. I constantly whip out the camera and capture the simplest of moments, and I treasure those memories because in that moment, time stood still. And they continue to stand still as I look at the images.
In Document Your Days, I will spend around 3 hours with you and your family. Maybe it's a Saturday morning and you have a lazy start to your day, cuddling in bed, before moving out to the kitchen to make pancakes. These moments matter.
Your investment for this session is $549 for up to 100 edited images, documentary style. I capture the majority of them in black and white, with a few colour thrown in there as well.
Let book it in. The coffee is on me x
This session was a photographers dream.
On this beautifully warm Sunday afternoon, I entered the Moffitt household and was immediately greeted by the beautiful little Finn who promptly lead me into his room to to show me his bunk bed. His brothers joined in and they cuddled, wrestled and laughed as I watched on, capturing this sweet moment between brothers. I was honestly blown away by their bond, how much they loved each other, how simple and fun it was simply wrestling on the bed.
Thank you for inviting me into your home and allowing me to capture your now.
I love what I do.
So it turns out being a writer means not actually writing much.
I have identified as a writer since I was in my teens, spending the majority of my time buried in a notebook or in my old clunker of a computer, tapping away original stories (or, fan fiction, but lets pretend that doesn't exist). Slowly as I made my way through my twenties I still identified as a writer, even though I had stopped writing on the regular, and my notebooks dried up.
The fact is, I kind of lost myself through the past few years and ultimately, lost that creative buzz that drove me to create.
Through the abundance of health related issues I have had, writing has been the furthest thing from my mind. Big important life things began happening, I planned a wedding and married the love of my life. I fell pregnant and birthed my baby. I had a really rough pregnancy, and a really rough first year of motherhood. Finally, I have emerged out of the haze of sleep deprivation (seriously - my child didn't sleep for a year) - and I am finally feeling like myself again.
So, I am going to start writing again. While my fiction juices definitely need flexing, I am really looking forward to blogging and sharing my life, my journey, my business, and all the beautiful, amazing and crazy lives I am allowed to enter and capture.
Really, I am just really lucky to be able to do what I love and I am really grateful for all the families and lovers that take a chance on me. I really pour my heart and soul into each session, and I think that reflects in the images I am able to present.
So thank you, and thank you for joining along. This life is a wild ride, as I am beginning to realise, and I am ready to share it through blogging and creating. I've got so many exciting things in the works for 2019 - lets do this!
A little snapshot of my beautiful life.
A morning, or an afternoon, where you get to hang out with your beautiful family. Chatting, laughing, playing games. Enjoying each others company. You might have a complete family, or you might be expecting your first little love. You might have just welcomed a tiny little human into the world. This is where I come in.
I'll spend an hour or two documenting these moments. We'll laugh, I'll play, we'll explore. We will have plenty of time to chat and for your little ones to get to know me. I'll share your journey. I'll document it. Every moment is worth capturing. Even the small ones.
I believe that photographs are one of our most cherished possessions. That’s why I am so passionate about what I do. I create a space for you to be yourself, live in the moment, and enjoy your loved ones.
Sessions are $390 for a 1-2 hour session and all edited images digitally.
From there, I offer bespoke albums and prints. I will send you an info pack and you can choose to add any of these on.
I want to create precious memories for you and your family to cherish forever. Print is so important, as it intensifies the bond shared in the image when viewed. There's nothing I love more than seeing my images up on the walls of your home for you to look at daily.
Get in touch for a comprehensive information pack. I can't wait to create some magic together.
At home sessions make my heart sing.
Your beautiful family, together in the one place you feel most comfortable. Your home. Your life. Your story. I spent a gorgeous morning with the Lyons family and from the moment I stepped into their house, I knew this session was going to be something special.
It's always a little nerve wracking photographing a fellow Photographer! Tegan is so wonderful at what she does, and it was truly such an honour to capture her with her family, her girls, so finally she was in front of the camera instead of behind it! These moments are so fleeting, even thought they don't feel like it at the time, and special images like these are so precious to have and look back on.
Thank you for inviting me into your home, Tegan. Your little girls are perfect! x
On a beautiful sunny weekday, I spent the morning with Zoe, Brad and Maci as they hung out together at home. The love shared between the three of them is just so obvious in these images. It was such a special session.